What is it about watching your kid play sports that brings out your inner homicidal maniac? Is it the amateur- hour refs? Is it the other parents, who talk smack to 8-year-olds and never shut up about little Billy’s insufficient playing time? Or is it your own kids, who—let’s be honest here—could give a crap about peewee soccer? Whatever it is, it’s not worth a night in the clink. So take a deep breath, and follow these rules for becoming a saner sports dad